Horary 11: Relationship Questions and the Third Party

“Does he love me.” “Will she come back.” “Is he seeing someone else.” These are the questions that arrive, and horary can address them technically with more precision than most branches of astrology. That precision is exactly why this lesson spends as much time on what not to answer as on how to answer.

The technique, briefly

• The querent — ruler of the 1st, plus the Moon.
• The other person — ruler of the 7th, for a lover, partner or anyone not otherwise family. For a specific relative, use their own house.
• Perfection between them answers whether the relationship comes about or resumes.
• Reception answers the question underneath the question: whether they are well disposed to each other. In relationship horary reception often matters more than the aspect, because it describes feeling rather than event.

The most useful configuration to recognise: reception without perfection. They are in each other’s signs and never aspect. Real regard, no contact. That describes a very common and very painful situation accurately, and querents recognise it immediately.

Worked example: reception without perfection

Question: will he get back in touch? Ascendant Scorpio, so Mars signifies the querent; the 7th is Taurus, ruled by Venus.

Mars is in Libra — Venus’s sign. Venus is in Scorpio — Mars’s sign. Mutual reception by domicile, and strong. But Mars is at 8° Libra and Venus at 3° Scorpio, separating, with no applying aspect between them at all, and the Moon is void.

Judgement, given plainly: there is genuine feeling on both sides and nothing in this chart shows contact resuming. The void Moon says the situation stays as it is.

That is a hard answer to deliver and it is a true one. The kind thing is not to soften it into a maybe; the kind thing is to be clear, and then to be a decent person about it for the next two minutes.

The third-party problem

Here is the line, and it is not a soft one.

1. A question about the querent’s own relationship is theirs to ask. “Will he come back to me” concerns the querent directly. Answerable.
2. A question about a third party’s private conduct is not. “Is he sleeping with her” asks you to investigate somebody who has not consented, cannot correct you, and may be harmed by what you say. Refuse it, and say why.
3. A question about a named person’s feelings, asked by somebody they are not involved with, is not. “Does my colleague like me” is harmless. “Is my colleague going to leave his wife” is not yours to answer.